Overcoming the Pressure of Change
It will soon be 2023. A shiny new year, and many of us will make resolutions. We must allow ourselves some flexibility and grace if we are going to be successful with the goals we set. Know this going in… you will stumble. Falling is just part of the process of growth. Forgive yourself, get back up and get moving toward the goal. Let it go and move on.
Becoming a better version of ourselves takes time, planning and the understanding that you must have flexibility within the plan. We will be starting diets and exercise programs. Reading books or taking courses, perhaps working on organization. Of course, that is a very short list of the common resolutions we make. You will have to be willing change your habits and perhaps your lifestyle if you are going to be successful. But also, be ready to change your new routine until it works best for you.
Awareness will help you see the signs of frustration before you get caught up. Remember to be flexible and give yourself grace.
If you keep trying to follow a rigid set of rules and prohibitions, you won’t hear your own inner cues and signals. What happens to me is, instead of noticing the signs and adjusting the plan, I immediately start defending myself. I have a long and well-rehearsed list of why I should be able to do what I want, or not do, whatever the conflict is. These feelings come on fast and we tend to react just as quickly.
Awareness is always the key. And awareness takes practice to develop. It is important to learn to pay attention to your thoughts and feelings. If you are present enough to see them, then you are also present enough to make a choice. Now you can choose to act the way you decide to. You can respond to the conflict instead of reacting. Instead of jumping into reaction, next time, pause just a moment. This will allow you time to respond according to the way you choose to behave.
You can ask yourself, how does the new me respond to that conflict?
Take a breath. Allow yourself to feel the activation. Notice how you feel physically and emotionally.
Stressed? Tired? Slow it down. Allow yourself to feel the emotions. Check in with yourself.
Now decide what to do. Am I going to eat the cookie?
Nah, I’ll go for a walk instead.